The night began with "let go home early so we can study for my 9am final" and ended with "show me your boobs for a free pack of gum".My breasts are worth 14 sticks for a dollar.
dude, my own friends sent me home from a party last night. real cool assholes. real cool
Just invented new drinking game watching Hocus Pocus... everytime they say "virgin" wetake a shot and yell out "to j****"
Another weekend, another 3 guys I have to awkwardly avoid while crossing campus...
do you know what somber means? it's kinda the opposite of a kegstand
I learned an important lesson this weekend.... I'm way to good at sex to travel for it. From now on he drives here...
I wish I could go about my daily activities with his dick inside me
A guy wearing a hard hat while floating the river. It's the most responsible drinking we saw all day.
I dunno. It's not as good as 'devourer of cocks' but I suppose few things are.
Make this decision based on your love for dick - NOT based on the fact that its probably one of the worst things you've ever thought of doing
I dont care if your mom convinced you it should be an abstinent christmas. I did horribly on finals and i'm out of booze, so you will get over her and FUCK. ME. NOW.
After giving a back rub to someone in the bathroom of the theater, he ripped an "employees must wash hands" sign off the wall to prove that he could and proceeded to hang it up in his house.
I just want dates and sex but the option to have that with whoever whenever I want
Yes. I am out of condoms. I kept filling them with glow paint and playing with them when I was on mushrooms, which resulted in me having unprotected sex last weekend
i keep smelling vagina and donuts, which pretty much sumarises this morning. happy birthday.
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