its good for cellulite if you don't wear underwear. its true
i think if you made a shrine it would be creepy
Im sending over a girl who thinks youre in the next twilight movie
your the best winggirl ever
Im drinking a large pickle jar full of Emergency, water and left over pickle juice and I dont care.
I don't know what I should tell you tell you. I don't want to encourage you to dye my dog.
he told me it was like eating gods vagina.
Getting stoned and sitting front row in a legal class.. Not my best idea
I'm going to need a Jurassic park sized pooper scooper to deal with all this shit last night caused.
The boys wrestled in the living room for the last condom while the girls chanted, "THE LAST MELON."
The amount of knuckle children I've had to the Farrah Abraham sex tape is disturbing and impressive
He was respectful of both me and my One Direction calendar.
I JUST GOT WOKEN UP TO HIM PISSING ON ME SAYING "IT HAS TO HAVE WATER TO GO TO THE BATHROOM" AND AFTER HE FINISHED HE DIDNT REMEMBER DOING IT
He's far too busy staring into my soul to touch my tits.
I made him leave to get me chicken nuggets so I could have sex with his roommate
I mean, I already hooked up with her boyfriend. The least I can do is accept her facebook friend request.
Randomize