I shall celebrate this moment with a beer conveniently located in the sock drawer directly to the right of me.
We had sex on a ferris wheel in canada, our relationship will never be the same
i was told that i was found face down in a plate of ketchup at the dinner table
is this the sara with the beer cane?
You fucked him. I baby bird fed him whiskey . I feel like we've bonded.
OMG IM A TIGER AND I LOVE ROARING
You're tall, so I have high hopes for your dick.
I still think he fell and scraped his elbow and lost his credit card buying 8 hot chocolates for hobos
I feel like everyone in class can tell we had a threesome last weekend.
He took my virginity but also my remaining pizza. i dont know how to feel right now.
I just found a piece of squished oatmeal cream pie in my armpit. So very sad.
Family trip though. I generally don't wheel too much ass with the fam in tow. Despite the fact my parents would be pleased if I did.
The box said 94% effective prevention of pregnancy if used correctly but God knows I’m not gonna use it right so let’s adjust that to like a 70%
I just want to say that I've always loved you and you are my best friend ever
You gave that creepy guy my number, didn't you? You really need to learn how to just say no, not interested.
It was probably the most embarrassing moment of my life. But I had cleavage, so I'm good!
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