He's been sleeping iwht ***
Nooo
Yeah I don't even know how, she looks like her mom smoked crack while she was in the womb
And then hit her in the face with a shovel
Just got back from doctors appt. He lied. It wasn't a pimple on his dick.
The guy in front of me in Sociology is definitely working on my farm in farmville. Never met him before. Do I thank him?
she definitely blew him on the riverbank, some lady floated past and said "have some pride honey", amazingly awkward
the russians are downstairs with the vodka loudly proclaiming happy birthday america. i don't care if it's the fourth, i care that it's 9 am and they woke me up.
If only guys knew how much awkward ass shaving goes into making sex this good...
i wanna meet her so much more now that I know she got toed in a hottub.
Ya bro it was wild. Hey, is latex digestible?
I just woke up and my mouth tastes like I licked the bathroom floor in the last ghetto bar we were in. I'm going to get my mouth checked for chlamydia. Do I see a dentist for that?
Seriously, you can't give someone's wife an orgasm on the dance floor of a gay nightclub and then hang out with her husband the following week
He said he wanted to sit next to the fountain so he could "watch the water hit the other water".
This isn't good. I can't find my mom. This is why we don't give her Fireball.
What happens if you die with an erection? Does it stay hard? Disclaimer: I'm high.
I JUST AGREED TO GO TO A CHILD'S BIRTHDAY PARTY AT A PLACE CALLED PUZZLE'S FUN DOME WHY DO I HATE MYSELF
Last night you were prentending to be a broom stick...you were laying on the floor and humming the Harry potter song.
Randomize
