he got wood on it!
i know. i had to sit in his lap on the plane. he also wore teva sandals.
...i was talking about hockey
R and i have drinken 4 bottles od red wine. By ourselfs
ps i may or may not be wearing a sequined bra
I just opened a gallon of milk that is good through the 10th of January- I hope I can say the same for myself.
I've been ignoring his texts cause last night I put him in my phone as 'ignore for atleast a day' and I trust my drunk self.
His penis has been a bonding mechanism beyond comparison.
Woke up covered in green glitter and beer. I am never leaving Ireland.
He is full of southern hospitality and I want to be full of him.
You were so high that you only FaceTimed me so that you could stare into your own eyes and not actually say anything
That sounds promising. I'm twerking to human nature.
Dude she tried to bite my face off last night, literally. I have never actually felt like a piece of meat until that point in life...
Can we go out and get blitzed in celebration that they'll be no more surprise kids
Do you think it would be weird to add her on Facebook?
You just commited a felony act together, I honestly think we're beyond this.
we f'd six times
f'd?
its sunday, i cant say fucked
He has the fingertips of a God
Randomize
