I don't know. The next thing I remember we were in the walmart parking lot making out.
she is the kim kardashian of front butts
I love drunk self when he leaves a prepacked bong for the morning... in the bathroom.
It was her 21st and she had one drink and fell asleep. I hate 90lb girls.
we marched down beaver avenue with lit tiki torches humming the olympics opening song.
Help. All alone. Room is. Changing colors. Dance party 2010, but without dancing.
We're celebrating his weight gain and arrest.and by we I mean I, and by celebrating I mean getting dangerously drunk
Your cousin just asked the bartender to start a round of vagina shots. Not body shots. Vagina shots. We're taking her out more often.
when the officer asked him if he had been drinking, he just goes, "yeah, you?" then falls onto the table.
We swapped clothes. He left in a v-neck and I left in a tuxedo. Classiest walk of shame or the gayest?
I love when groups of boys part so I can walk through. It's like a red sea of penises, and I am their Moses.
I HAVE TOO MICH DICK TALKING TO ME IDK WHAT TO DO.
So after the absinthe shots_____(fill in the blank area for me please)......
I am really drunk and also a zombie.
He was laying on a lawn chair, fell off onto his stomach and asked, "where'd the stars go?" That high.
Randomize
