Thats how high i was. The fact that he looked like Seth Rogan was apparently a good thing.
The fact you even thought licking it would fix it boggles my mind
Well it worked
Not the point
He;s fine. He just kept saying "hurricane Gordon is coming to shore" and flexed his muscles a lot.
Struggs. It's also 90 degrees out but I'm not sure I can feel heat or cold any more. Too hungover.
at which point he tried to give himself a prince albert piercing with the stapler on his desk.
Overdraft my account again. Parents are starting to ask questions. What would go over better a gambling or drug addiction??
I've already made the "blackout on move in day" decision
He realized that I was watching deadliest catch while we were jerkin off on FaceTime.
I keep shaking cocoa puffs out of my hair. Best Sunday Funday ever.
They've taken all the lighthearted fun out of S&M.
i want to platonically make out with them, platonically. in the back of this minivan
He's interpretive dancing to Crazy by Britney Spears and expressing his feelings for either me or the guy next to us
My cardio is walking around the office looking for free food.
He put his burrito in the bag with his dildo.
We couldn't find her anywhere. Finally, I saw her sitting in my bathroom floor spraying hair mouse into her mouth and whispering "I fucking love whipped cream." WHAT DID YOU GIVE HER AND CAN I HAVE SOME?
Randomize