and in the morning, while we were eating breakfast, she was all " i think someone sneezed into my shirt..." she'll never know.
Nights of college: 1. Virgins: 1. Yes.
soooo.. i guess the cop said he'd drop the charges if i go to some AA meetings and i said fuck AA. not one of my better choices.
we need to stop having unprotected sex.
ya i know. we're like the secret life of the american whores.
Hey I have to teach you how to run in heels before vegas
i was trying to find the best way to say come over and have sex, without saying it.
You totally drew a penis wizard on my closet that says "I travel for cock rock"
traded hat for shot of whiskey. lovah yo life. only ADVENTURE NOW. OH GOD IT WENT TO CAPS LOCK
It was one of those "wake up holding a random metal flower" kind of nights.
What made this night legendary was getting pulled over for looking suspicious while wearing an iron man mask
I posted her number in the m4m casual encounters area of Craigslist.
I guess her always saying "gay men love me!" will finally get put to the test.
..puke & rally mid art final. HAPPY CINCO DE MAYO!
literally just blacked in. Im watching what to expect when your expecting, eating pretzels and peanut butter, and I have someone's underwear around my neck.
He's talking about me being Slave Princess Leia and how he'll chain me up. I don't have the heart to point out that he would be Jabba in that scenario...Is it bad that his lack of SW knowledge is destroying my lady boner?
Some guy I'd never met and didn't invite threw the punch bowl at the wall and set the plastic skeleton on fire. I don't think we'll be getting the full deposit back
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