i just shit an entire soup salad and breadsticks from the olive garden... bud light wins again.
We discussed how the marijuana was making the dopamine float around our nucleus accumbens last night when we were high. Yet another example of how our science classes are perverting our good times.
i was taking the test and had to adjust my boner and my teacher thought i was cheating or something
When he came he kept saying "oh god oh god" and he sounded just like his dad. awkward...
Slipping me an edible before my ochem final was not your brightest idea. Looks like I'm switching to business.
Sorry girl, my dick is like a rollercoaster. You only get a picture after you ride
she is legit wearing a plastic bag around her neck as a necklace. she says it serves two purposes.
I'm covered in sharpie and the girl next to me just said something smells like fried food. Hint: it's me. Why am I in class?
Im having a christmas reunion party tonight. Last year i ate my own contact. We'll see how this year goes
In honor of the internet blackout, I think everyone needs to change their Facebook pictures to ones of them being blacked out.
Hey, i turned the toilet into a water fountain. Drink up.
Drunk life lesson just learned the hard way: do not try to play hump the great dane. He may take you up on it.
I'm sitting outside your room listening for sex noises eating pepperoni...slowly
I feel like there's def a learning curve to the sex swing
I don't mean to alarm you but are the strongest testicles in the family. I just learned I can lift 90 lb with my balls! Beat that.
Randomize