all we ever talk about is how much i like your dick or my drug problem.
i think i want to fuck a midget just to see how difficult it would be
how should i go about explaining the hickey i drunkenly gave myself last night?
She washed lettuce and peppers in the shower and proceeded to make a salad
filling out my bracket based on schools with ppl I've hooked up with
The woman at the bus stop told me i smell delicious and asked if i wear cotton then proceeded to tell me about her shellfish allergy
Your friend, the one I told I would brush his teeth with my tongue, what's his name again?
It's always a good night until the penis tattoo makes an appearance
as he was bent over the toilet, he turned to me and said "barbarian kyle is much stronger than regular kyle" and then went right back to puking.
I have to stop letting him stay all weekend. I feel like a cored apple.
Deciding whether to take my sex toys home for Christmas will be the biggest decision I make this holiday season
This really high kid past out in the corner of the room holding a box of cheez its in his arm. My idol.
I woke up naked and you weren't here. What a relief.
it was like where's waldo, only the stakes were much higher.
we found her on the beach half naked talking to a palm tree
Which half?
Randomize
