No, don't ignore my call, i just need to know, whats cuter a pig in boots or a miniature horse sitting down..
we talked about european history as he fucked me from behind in the shower... i think it was a success
i dont know what to do
with your life?
no, with my silly bandz, im already wearing 3
he walked down the highway for 3 miles at 4 am, and got me coffee on the way. i dont think a blow job would have been enough.
I can't remember much about walking home last night. I think I kicked a dog.
You ordered 6 boxes of pizza and laughed in the pizza guys face when you didn't pay for any of them.
I'm going out w/ her for her b-day in a bit. I just talked to one of her drunk friends on the phone who asked if I could "handle 7 lesbian." This could be interesting.
you're expensive. Idk about all this. What happened to free make outs?
Sobriety and mild self-respect
I miss the good ol days when id just come home from school and thered be a costco size box of condoms on my bed.
my parents really loved me back then.
Last night you found an onion ring in your fries and then you started singing "A Moment like this"
We got drunk and crashed a fifty year old woman's birthday party for the food. Whoops.
He came on my favorite pants. He is dead to me.
He was fingering me and I came so hard that I actually broke his wrist. We're at the ER now.
Hey do you care to explain why there are 3 empty pickle jars next to me when I woke up or do I even wanna know?
Last time we had sex i was dressed like a ninja turtle and someone else was in our bed, so this time should be fine.
I hope ur kiddin
wish i was
Randomize
