I just saw my grandmother naked. again. this needs to stop now.
why does my vagina smell like weed?
omg thats a great idea
I am at a bar watching a rat tail get braided.
eww mummy girl is here...
what the fuckk. i just want to hold her down, wax her eyebrows, and give her some morals.
Our adventure is going to pick up his pipe and weed that he ditched when he got pulled over the other day.
HOT DATE.
He was at the bottom of the stairs showering himself with the popcorn, then eating a few handfuls and running around.
new years resolution, not be in jail at midnight for 3rd year in a row.
The last thing I remember was talking about the economic viability of cock ring manufacturing... we had some good ideas
you kept yelling "this bitch stole my phone" to the guy who found you passed out in the parking lot
I opened up my wallet and it was filled with puke.
Cops just came and got two guys out of my class. I can't do college. Seriously cannot rage at this school anymore.
We'll wreck the fuck out of my furniture. How often does one really get the chance to fuck through a table with no negative consequences?
I know it's like I wanna bring somebody fun who I haven't drunkenly expressed my feelings for. Or hooked up with. It's a struggle.
OMFG I JUST SEARCHED DILDO ON THE WORK SHARED AMAZON ACCOUNT!!!!!
There's a difference tho. *I* drink at seven in the morning because I work graveyards. YOU drink at seven in the morning cause you're an alcoholic.
Randomize
