you were definitelymotorboating random chicks as they walked out of the bar. just like, down the line. you kept yelling "Motor Boats for everyone!!!!"
:( I miss blowjobs.
This is probably the strangest conversational segue we've ever had.
i had a headache and asked the kid next to me for aspirin. he gave me esctacy instead. gotta love college.
So the bros are yelling at another bro to get that dildo off the roof. And there is indeed a dildo looking object on the roof.
They seemed upset when they walked out and saw a penis in a mouth
Would it be inappropriate to trade Christmas cookies for sex?
By the end of the first quarter he was so hammered he was pouring beer into the crockpot with the miniature hot dogs and BBQ sauce saying he loved the supper bowl and he loves taking mini weinies to the face
He says he invented a new sex move called The Redbird that we can only do when I'm on my period. Should I be concerned?
went to their party, left halfway through to fuck a pledge, came back to keep drinking. I think everyone won.
I could tell you were slightly drunk by the time you started having a conversation with my tiki torch
Is this really the life I've chosen for myself?
We had sex and I never took my mets hat off... I feel like Duda knows and approves.
You know you have an interesting job when you go to work and have to Google search "How to get poop out of a dryer".
Dude i just passed out while getting head...she cried
If I have put a neon “vacancy” sign on my skirt for him to get the picture I will.
Randomize
