I just got really nervous and swallowed all of my birth control
Did you know that cab drivers don't take quarters for payment? They don't even like it when you ask.
no. i seriously look so gross with this sunburn. i wouldnt even wanna bang myself. and im really into myself.
i would rather give Shaq a handjob than take this accounting final
Playing the biology drinking game in my 8am. Drink everytime he says species or organism. I love st. Patricks day
And whoever invented the condom should be put to death.
well on a positive note i hear those vitamins you take while pregnant do wonders for your nails
I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE. I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE. I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE.
I feel like wearing underwear would just be poor planning
she gave me head while i watched the '98 Rose Bowl on espn classic. Ryan Leaf really was a huge bust
Ok, I have three hours. I'm trying to work out two blow jobs and a taco.
Please don't buy a buttplug. It won't fill the empty space in your heart.
Alcohol and IMDB don't always mix with 100% accuracy
Guys are like someone else's baby; i'll play with them but if responsibility is involved i'll hand them off.
That would involve putting on clothes and I don't think I can face that right now.
Randomize
