he saw my emergency pass-out-in-the-bathroom-after-drunken-puking cot in the bathroom.
Just stepped in shit. Not sure if its mine or the dog's. Get some of our friends on the way back from work and just have the intervention now. I will totally understand.
He's a good guy, we stopped by his old church.
And you didn't burst into flames?
Everytime I see a couple on campus walking and holding hands I just want to yell he's gonna lie!
As a jewish boy dating her she thinks everypart of christmas is my first time. Helllllo bj under mistletoe!!
We finally have the house to ourselves and your out playing Lance Fucking Armstrong
Let's not fuck on an air mattress tonight...I'd rather get rug burn.
Wake up. We're going shopping for booze and samurai swords.
I just pulled the nickels from earlier out of my bra in class. The guy next to me is either terrified or intrigued.
I'm not gonna lie. I'm a little scared.
Good. The Jell-O shots look great.
My dad found my bra hanging from my rear view mirror. Happy long weekend.
Yeah we fucked. I ran into her the next day, I had to pick up the girl scout cookies I ordered from her boyfriends kids.
Last nights hook up turn into a star wars history lesson.. He's luck y he's pretty..
Did we actually play with swords last night or did I dream that?
just answer this one ? for me. why is there human shit in my shower right now?
Randomize
