it's 4 am, i'm drinkin beer and re-drywalling my bathroom. this could possibly be a bad idea.
we need to go to the store. i'm tired of having bud light for breakfast.
do you want me to pick up budweiser instead?
how convenient is it that the kid i'm fucking lives right next to planned parenthood?
a price tag just fell out of my vag. i guess its worth $13.99...
I had a dream she was puking on me, but sadly in real life she was puking on me too
We need to play Chardee MacDennis. Contact me when you have an available date. This is not a question.
My dad got me a charm braclet....his way of trying to support my gayness....
In other news, someone I've had sex with won jeopardy last night.
Is "I want you to destroy my insides" too forward?
Which sister was it? The one I accidentally hit when my shoe flew off or the one I ate candy off of when we were high?
I just want to bone him one last time before he moves across the country with his new (average looking) girl friend.
Currently using my kid's computer to charge my vibrator. #thisis30ish
OF COURSE I NEED TO KNOW I MUST KNOW EVERYTHING
YOU ARE NOT OMNIPOTENT AND YOU HAVE TO DEAL WITH THAT
I AM OMNIPOTENT AND YOU HAVE TO DEAL WITH THAT
Yeah. We're taking this fuck buddy relationship to the next level. Sober weekday sex.
I used to want you to marry him...Now I just think you deserve a bigger penis than that.
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