I dont get chicks, its like they only care about themselves and money
sounds like you understand them just fine
apparently it's not kosher to shit in a litter box when there's a line for the bathroom
he kept bringing up different times we had sex and i wouldnt say anything back. i would never confirm nor deny the situation...like a politician ya kno
you know you were refereeing rock paper scissors for who got to make out with your sister right?
Please come to History lecture. The kid two seats over is belligerently drunk.
Pretty much knew it was gonna be awful when the extra condoms she had from her ex were entirely too big for my dick
the most drunk i have ever been? possibly. the most drunk i have ever been on a monday? definently.
I legitimately just tried to piss above my head. I got to my chest at highest. There's piss everywhere.
I think i can hear god laughing at me and yelling "thou shall pay for thy habits of underage drinking" through a megaphone directly at my eardrums
Thank you for caring about my cervix.
This is my life. Enjoy the view
Breaking news: when you're gone every towel is a dick towel
you going clubbing tonight?
well its tuesday isnt it
(919) the date's not going well. He's on his phone talking about his eBay amine shit...
Our son just found our secret Sex Dungeon that is no longer hidden in our basement. He brought his Xbox and the TV down there he is currently sitting in the sex swing playing video games. What do I do?
Randomize
