She had a bottle of NAIR in her bathroom, but she clearly hadn't been using it.
so today in my theology class we brought up the proper way to have sex. so rough sex was said by the teacher...I said I know a girl that likes to be choked. sorry but everyone knew it was you
theyre selling pepper spray in the courtyard. hellooo atl
She had a boyfriend but was all over this drunk guy that she just met..she said she loved him and then puked all over him.
as I was walking out the door her and her roommate started singing "toot it and boot it".. I'm in love
no, forget the keg and come see this. prego pants here is dunking chicken nuggets into pudding and crying over a cat show on animal planet.
why is my underwear the only thing i was wearing that smells like vodka?
She rode an inflatable shark down the stairs. Viva shark week.
Dear god how many nuts did u bust in me my vagina feels like a bowl of jello.
While eating post sex burritos I dripped taco bell sauce on my boob. He licked it off and asked why I hadn't thought of that before.
Apparently I still called the officer "sir" despite the fact I was at a .21 BAC. Southern girls are raised right
Look. When I let you cum on my tits don't fuck it all up by going "SKEET SKEET SKEET" it just pisses me off.
Who's the easier target... Bandages on the knees, tramp stamp, or bra showing? Not in the mood to work for it tonight.
You told him about your cats? I told his friend to put his dick in my mouth, and you talked about cats!?
I just destroyed that poor boy. Picked him up and put him wherever I wanted, it was like the Pride version of Elf on a Shelf.
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