Oh. They ARE dating. Kinda sad. Have such an urge to be a huge bitch and steal him but my morality is in the way. FUCK YOU MORALITY.
As soon as I saw the video camera and red light on, I started rolling my eyes when he would put it in me and telling him maybe his dick was too small cause I didn't feel anything...trust me that tape is going nowhere
And I know a few people wouldnt want to even be around high people. Which is sad. But jet packs are cool.
You can't see him, he's in front of the dildo, but Amelia Earhart is blocking your view.
I hope making "real" money at your "real" job is worth it because you totally missed beer and dorrito mac n cheese tuesday.
i had to cut you off after you shoved a bunch of bottle caps in your mouth and pretended you had braces.
Don't lose. A little bit of my soul dies every time a beer pong game is lost.
He'd pee in it. And since it's PBR I'd have no idea
somehow this went from sexting to explaining my eating disorder.
He knocked me in the face with the phone during my light show. Didn't even feel it. Ecstasy is amazing
I keep getting congratulated for drinking 2 six packs of mikes hard and winning the Olympic marathon and I don't remember this shit and now my throat is on fire
The part where he comes over and ignores you isn't what makes me mad about that story... It's the fact that he ate your tacos, AND THEN proceeded to ignore you. That's cold hearted.
nothing like a long car ride to make you think of all the bad things you've done
I'm pretty sure my therapist gave me the green light to fuck him.
Seriously. There were about 4 hours in which I swear my nose was not attached to my face.
Randomize
