I just put lube in Matt's bellybutton. He looks unhappy.
Omg. There's def a kid, like 10 years old, sitting in a buggy at wal mart holding a sign that reads "I can't behave"
legit been throwing up since 7am. told my parents the two bowls of puke in my dorm were soup
We've got 2 weeks of college left-I want to feel like Gary Busey by graduation.
I think I get why guys like boobs so much. I just motorboated myself and it's fun. My boobs feel soft and squishy on my face.
he puked in my glove box, looked up at me and said "There's not much to say"
I don't know how I got here... but I think I'm in a Christian Impact meeting... I'm trying to act as straight as possible. They can sense gay.
The police report said that there were 25 cases of bud light, two hookers fighting in the street, 13 cop cars, and two road blocks, a kid got tazered, another got maced, and over a hundred people in the house
So that means its a bad thing that your dad found it huh?
He told me that if I were a guy he'd go gay for me. Honestly don't know how to take that.
How can other people our age be acting like adults when I'm still taking my birth control pill with left over gin and tonic from the night before?
i feel like i shouldn't just had to send a text that said "no i will not eat your ass"
She was screaming and crying about how she couldn't find her middle finger. Then, she threw her body on to the pavement. Thats the last time we buy a freshmen a handle.
But I only have 2 emotions angry and horny
He was about to go in...and he fell off the bed. Ruined mood!
If history is any guide, his morals are no match for my tits
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