Black lace...the rest is up to ur imagination
can we get nightvision for the apartment?
Manager just farted into the intercom. Whole place heard it. A number of people stopped everything and looked at him. Best. Night. Ever.
We should be called the Road Head Warriors
We discussed how the marijuana was making the dopamine float around our nucleus accumbens last night when we were high. Yet another example of how our science classes are perverting our good times.
on the way home the dog started throwing up her bone in the car..so naturally i started to puke too
I can only imagine the horrible things my future wife is doing on spring break right now.
i told them to call me paula dean as i was making all 10 for $10 boxes of pizza rolls in the microwave
He said female orgasms are a myth and refuses to even try to give me one.
You did this to me with your delicious pizza and moonshine.
I'll forgive you once we're drunk again by noon.
AND FUCKING MGMT JUST CAME ON. CAN I GO DROWN MYSELF IN LESBIANS OR SOMETHING? IS IT TIME TO LESBIAN
we're fated to lesbian
apparently i tried to facetime the drunk bus last night, that's probably why we had to walk back to campus
Drunk ass.
literally 50% of my time being 20 has involved my genitals thus far
I never thought I would have to arrest my own parents on a sunday night
That man fucks like a champ. The sex was so good I did him again in the morning just to be sure
Randomize