College reaches a new low. We just carved a shot glass out of a potatoe.
so all night Ive been that girl with her tits out @ the bar. I mean I dropped jaws, yo. But in a classy way.
grad school is all the worst parts of undergrad, without the binge drinking and bad decisions to make up for it
i felt horrible..i wanted to somehow give him his vcard back
that's a non refundable transaction sweetheart
vagina is talking i cant
ASIANS HAVE SEX TOO!! I just watched it happen in the library.
The smoke alarm went off as soon as we opened the closet.
Just made macaroni burritos. Fukkin awesome. We'll have to try this when I'm sober.,!
I must have drunkenly masturbated really loud last night, cause my roommate and his wife wont look at me
I wish someone would just come knock on my door and fuck me already so that me and my stuffed animals aren't the only ones who see my amazing spring break tan. I'm not getting skin cancer so I can just sit here abstinent.
Whenever I walk away from the group without saying anything, NEVER assume I'm just going to the bathroom.
There's a patch of dead grass from where you would notoriously throw up after every good night in July. This summer was great.
New guy at work just gave me a Percocet for my headache. Officially best friends
Virgins should have to wear a badge. This burden is too heavy...
See I am maturing. I just got in from my DRIVE of shame......
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