If i have to listen to his problems about his girlfriend, he should at least let me suck his cock.
Woke up to a denim duvet cover this morning... why r guys so tacky?
you made your own hammock out of a towel and duct tape.
Before you ask, yes. Whatever you're wearing IS too slutty for his mom's funeral.
Also on a more serious note, what says pull my hair more: straight or soft curls?
you're asking me why i keep burn ointment in my purse.... do you really want to know the answer to that question?
Water skiing blazed is the most scary thing I've ever done.
Girl we've come a long way since our first Brazilian wax
I have random bruises including my spine and visible bite marks on my neck. Thanksgiving car sex accomplished.
Do you miss the park or do you miss us having sex in public?
Not my type, but the penis looks fun.
But I'm currently thinking of all my bad decision making last night and giving myself a time out.
My walk of shame turned into having to get his dad to tow my best friends car out of the snowbank in his driveway
He stole me a cantaloupe and we drunkenly broke into a park and ate it on a bench with my pocket knife. I think i need to marry him
Good to know. If our sexting moves past early 1900s vernacular, I'll be sure to use that once or twice.
Randomize
