My hot female boss's cubical is right next to mine with a wall between us. Do you think it is too forward to make a glory hole in the wall?
I would kind of like a job that starts at 10:30 and i'll work til 7. I'm not very productive in the morning. My main focus is not puking from 9-11.
Just got off the phone with poison control. They're more concerned about our alcohol intake than that the beer bong was last cleaned with pine sol.
I HAVE FLAVORED BLOW. THIS SHOULD NOT EXISIT.
You were humming mission impossible as we ran from the cops
I mean besides the fact someone got stabbed, I still had a pretty good night.
Great. Woke up in Ts room wearing one sock, a glove and a beret with a sorrority chick CLEARLY out of my league. Jose Cuervo you ARE a friend of mine.
My halloween constume SCREAMS "Hey i just got done with a shitty relationship and I'm DTF"
I hope your pay increase has gone through because I might need bail. This is not what I dreamed adulthood would be like.
Lets just say that a certain piercing set off certain alarms when I went thru the airport detector/scanner thingie. David was high fived like 12 times.
I swear I can't go out anymore. It's like he put a GPS in my dick. I don't know if I should feel awkward or proud...
what the hell is that chicken wire thing she's holding?
An artistic expression of her stupidity.
But I REALLY want to hide my crazy for as long as possible with him so he'll date me.
Until you have had Country Grammar stuck in your head whilst writing a Supreme Court brief you've never lived.
BILL GATES DONALD TRUMP LET ME IN NOW
He has great stamina, he knows how to use his tongue, and he's hung like a goddamn Pegasus. I can overlook the man bun.
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