Why does Jon Cryer have a career?
That is a good question.
i'm in the guys across the halls apartment. i think 7 MIP guy wants me. he just got a medical marijuana card. might be worth it.
she complimented my bra when we were hooking up. this lesbian thing has its upsides
We left around 4 AM after the stripper showed no mercy and dropped into a split on Matt's nose. Massive nosebleed.
no, literally. he fb chatted me and said "since you're online i figured we could bang tonight?"
I don't appreciate you drunk dressing passed-out me in spandex for bed
My horoscope told me I'm getting laid tonight. Please don't make the stars be liars
Aparently i was the only guy at her parents bbq throwing up in the pool so Im the asshole right...
If you say no to drinking on a Monday then I'm going to take you to the hospital for a MRI
Got drunk with him at an Irish pub ended up losing him for twenty minutes when I finally find him his piss drunk singing Irish folk music with a group of Irish guys and a midget
He meets the coolest people when he's drunk
Turns out the dorm toilet can't take a punch. Gonna be a long year without Mexican food.
HOW DO YOU FORGET TO FINISH WINE
she's pretty fucking smug for someone who has had unprotected sex with a convicted felon
Totes just ripped ass and the bartender's eyes got wet
it will be a surprise...all I can say is stripper clown.
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