found an empty one..2nd door on the right...i'm already naked.
don't worry about the neighbors I'm like 99% sure all that snow covered a good portion of our vomit
She passed out in my bed last night before anything happened. She felt really bad about that, so she gave me head when we woke up this morning.
the cops didnt even wait to start drinking the confiscated alchohol from the party
Got to see someone fall down the stairs while holding hot coffee and a folder full of papers. Best Monday ever.
And for your info. Don't pee outside with glow sticks. People will still see you.
Just wondering did you put mouse traps and brownies on my porch?
Her stepmother interrupted our sex to tell her it was midnight and she wanted to do a sympathy shot for her 50th.
Don't break up.
You're cock blocking me from my own boyfriend. What kind of shit is that?
I think it's time to give up this life and become vikings. You in?
Ryan. I woke up. At the neighbors house. And by the neighbors. I mean the ones to the north. The ones that hate us. Please call me. I am so confused and you are gone
At the neighbors house?! Like in it or outside???
In it on the fucking couch. No idea how i got here.
So nothing to worry about, but i'm probly going to jail soon, just thought i should let you know so you didn't worry. Bye!
There’s a special place in hell for tall guys with small dicks
She shaved her vagina in my bed. Good night
No. No. Fuck you! You can do your own grocery shopping.
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