Bullshit. I know you're watching The Dog Whisperer
That Cesar Milan is captivating
btw.sex in the wood isnt as romantic as it seems.heels kept sinking in the dirt and pine needles were sticking to the fishnets
i wish i had your life
I just saw a girl in Albersons in spandex and curlers buying PBR. Only PBR.
my breakfast just consisted of gushers (made with real fruit!) and they're trying to tell me im not eating right?
Well he paid for dinner, so I paid for the Plan B, but the parking ticket I got is totally his responsibility.
So far, my day has been sparkling with the tears of a thousand rainbow unicorns. I'd say this is quality shit you've grown.
Her Grandmother felt me up AND paid for dinner. If she doesn't get her shit together I'm gonna be her Step Grandfather.
Tonight, a friend walked in and said "oh look at that. Drunk on the living room floor. Just as expected." this is my life. This is my life.
How do I ask where the Jello shot cups are at Walmart without sounding like white trash?
It's pizza for people who hate themselves. I rang the place up once i'd finished and told them if i was on death row it would be my last meal because by the time i'd got half way through it I would be begging to die.
But then I ordered two more because it was 2-4-1 and my life is a mess
Hit on in the middle of a Wal-Mart McDonald's by a really awkward nerd. There is not enough nope in the world.
Hi please disregard the last text and if you'd like our entire interaction
Done
You're just a heartbreaker with a knitting problem
I WOULD NEVER LIE ABOUT SOMETHING AS SERIOUS AS SABADO GIGANTE BEING CANCELED
Our breakfast options are microwave popcorn, wavy lays and fireball
Randomize
