69 is so not fun when his penis is sporting a 70s hairstyle
Woke up naked in another mans house. If that keeps happening, then I probably need to go gay. You know to make it ok.
We're attempting to get a tally of how may people puked last night...Please respond with your vomit status.
Apparently I whispered "Jesus was here" and bailed out of the moving taxi.
I dont have any paper so I'm writing class notes on my first response direction pregnancy paper. Judging eyes are all around.
Oh, and also, a couple of straight girls showed up. But they ran away.
You got into a heated argument about Frankenstein's intelligence while double fisting burritos from taco bell.
I'm beginning to think the entirety of my appeal is due to the size of my ass.
..puke & rally mid art final. HAPPY CINCO DE MAYO!
He told me to be careful with the shrooms because he mostly had caps left. He sounded apologetic but that's the best news all week.
Less than a month to go... I do not understand how I was able to put up with a roommate who wears bright green Crocs for a year.
i may or may not be making depth charges with cough syrup. i'll call you if i survive.
You should really look at your snapstory. It has us screaming " MANSION DICK! SUCK IT! FUCK IT!" By the way im currently in a mansion and need you to pick me up
I got a lap dance last night from a girl while I was wearing a Captian America onsie. My life does not suck.
are you inviting me to ice cream?
the subtext of everything i say to you is inviting you to ice cream
Randomize
