How come it tastes like onions whenever I go down on her?
is it a bad thing if he can only get off when i start talking like one of the girls from Jersey Shore??
I took a picture of his ID so i could remember how to spell his last name and facebook stalk him later...I think he saw me do it
Does Vicodin go better with white or red wine?
For some reason I have a hard time believing getting drunk and recreating a movie about singing transvestites is ever very far from a situation you're in.
I'm not sure if doing him was such a good idea. Yes the sex was good, but I'm scared I set myself up for failure in 2011 because he's the hottest guy. Ever.
No you are right. With a nickname like Monster Cock, you shouldn't expect him to want to "just talk". I'd be insulted too
Remember when I booked a hotel room for next sat? Nneither do I.
Sorry about bonging beers with your mom but in all fairness you were late...
Her fucking playlist had randy newman on it. It was like woody was watching the whole time.
Sex aside I am really scared about Syria...
Can you please help mom and dad? Theyre trying to figure out Skype, and its like 2 cavemen finding fire.
you left your anal beads in the dishwasher
There's a rash on my genitals that would like a word with you.
I cant promise hot guys but i can promise alcohol which is close enough.
Randomize