That poor girl was naked and had to be at a job interview in an hour
'fingered' and 'feelings' NEVER belong in the same sentence.
I wonder why dictionaries dont have indexes to help find the words easier.
you rearended a car with your bike and then puked all over his back windshield. They made BUI's for you.
Our adventure is going to pick up his pipe and weed that he ditched when he got pulled over the other day.
HOT DATE.
after he fucked me and not his girlfriend, i told him to be a gentleman and close his eyes as i ran to the bathroom naked. so sweet.
your definition of "gentleman" is so absurd.
You could have chosen coming to fuck me over getting too hammered to drive. But you made your bed, and now you get to jack off alone in it.
I just passed a drug test. I want to shout that from the top of a mountain. Can we have beers on the top of a mountain?
You were a path of destruction, you started with eating half the cake, proceeded by throwing the rest in the sink and dumping water all over it while laughing... then throwing the drunk helmet across the room yelling that you didnt want to wear it... i'd say it was a successful birthday.
Yea he called the cop officer fonzarelli and asked him if he was mad because happy days was off the air. Boom, beaten and arrested
If a marine in My bed is not considered a valid excuse for missing class then I don't want to live in America anymore
I don't want sex or anything I just really need someone to appreciate how shiny my hair is
Man the amount of drugs being done at a wedding with a bunch of surgeons was disturbing
He was shirtless in my yard saying he was jesus
reminiscing on last night: why the fuck did I feel the need to stand on chairs everytime we took a jello shot?
Randomize
