Are you guys doing anything tonight?
Krysta
never trust anyone who drives a pt cruiser.... write that down
Pretty sure I just has te same conversation as you. He suggested I get, sell, and fuck the hoes, and once all was said and done, that I should refer afforementioned hoes to him, to perform felatio.
Checked out the free sonogram van on campus and got a free DVD of my sweet food baby.
In the middle of getting a blow job, she looked up at me and said "this isn't the first time I've done this today"
This bitch flirting at the bar needs to close her legs and open up a book. I can literally feel my IQ dropping every time she bends down to show her tits.
Jealous?
Very.
Wake up, take the dog to the trails, puke in the woods. More days should start like this.
Apparently I called him, said "vodka" and then hung up on him.
I definitely don't remember licking the drag queens boob.
Well. I mean as excuses for running late go, 'losing track of time in the bathhouse' has gotta be up there on the top ten.
I climbed up on the tank of the toilet so I could take a slo-mo vid of myself pissing into the garbage can, but the base of the toilet shattered and I had to bail.
Dude why can't I remember anything after walking in from my first beer bong?
It was immediately followed by your second, third, fourth and fifth
Danny put 5 hr energy in the jungle juice (that brilliant bastard) and I almost showed my penis to Alex. It was a rough night.
Cum just came out of my nose. That is all.
My boobs are too perky to pay that much for a car
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