If it makes you feel better, you're better at taking it in than ass than she is...
Well...yeah actually, that does make me feel better
I just got invited to go home with a married couple...
The kid in front of me is videochatting and typing to his gf. I should make poop/sex faces over his shoulder, right?
Tiger Woods should have just walked in, gave everyone a high five, and left.
how bad would it be if i made his twitter my home page?
The dog threw up again, this time IN the toilet. I've taught him well.
I was carrying him baywatch style into my place because he passed out.
its not a party unless mikie exposes himself
I feel like fucking him is something we all do but don't want to admit to. like masturbating or peeing in the shower
PS- I just ordered a two man zebra costume. Would you like to be my back end?
i'm not saying you're gay. i'm just saying all my gay friends think you have a great ass.
Now that I'm sober, I'm realizing you put your name in my phone as "wowww"
NO FUCKING RANDOMS IN AN ALLEY
Good rule of thumb: only list personal references with whom you have hallucinated
LACE UP YOUR GODDAMN SHOES
N O
Randomize
