I hope my future cuntsucker is that tight
yup put them legs up on your shoulders and eat her like some folgers
eat her like coffee?
Great, now justin bieber is gonna sing a song about chile
Let's face it. We both have sexy parts. Why not have them touch?!
Well the party says they're going to have three kegs and four trampolines. I think I'm going to invite my EMT buddies just to be safe.
Just saw a cop give four blondes gas for their car on their way to Vegas. They seriously ran out of gas and called 911 about it. Its like a porno plot.
Jim came in did 3 body shots of her she said "I like your tongue" and they left. I swear to god its deja vu he's done it before
I don't know where I am and I feel like a hippo shat in my mouth. This sofa is comfy though.
Last night at McDonalds, you lied across the counter, pulled up your shirt and yelled "BODY SHOTS"...
I just had a sex dream about orange juice, so there's that.
He washed his dick in my kitchen sink after sex. I think he might be a keeper.
I just had sex with a man wearing a Darth Vader helmet....he pressed the voice button the whole time that said "I am your father". I don't think I can ever come back from this
Had a dream I dropped the L word and immediately threatened to kill myself
You probably shouldn't be having nightmares about expressing affection
Honestly cannot tell if I’m magical or really, really high.
But on a side note, how the fuck do you "accidentally " get peed on
Randomize
