You drinking a lot?
No.
Define a lot
If this place produced love children they would be born wearing Lilly Pullitzer with raging coke addictions.
Don't leave without me in the morning. I keep scaring everyone cause I'm sleeping in the bathtub.
Yes. Being a lesbian's wingman is a fun as it sounds
i think i should save myself the $200 for a prom dress. i mean why bother. its just going to be covered in vodka/jizz/and puke by the end of the night.
He told me he was a psychology major, and I responded by asking him where he hid his vagina.
Still can't believe they give people like us a drivers license and college degree.
Maybe I should forgo underwear.
This is a family BBQ no?
I'm practically paying him in tacos to have sex with me.
Apparently I told a girl last night, that's she's super beautiful and I don't want to fuck she just deserves being eaten out
Lets play hurricane shelter. And the shelter is my bed, and we forgot our clothes.
I'm supposed to be maturing, but no instead I'll be shitting my pants in Delaware for my 30th.
Hahahaha nah you won't shit your pants - but you will fully try mushrooms.
Fun. You missed it. Michael broke a door with his erection.
He kept saying "Ayyyyyyy" during foreplay... during sex.... during everything! It felt like I was having sex with friggin Fonzie from Happy Days!
i just really want to fuck a guy wearing lederhosen
it'll be sexier than it sounds, i promise
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