Im def. not watching the CMAs. If Kanyes not gonna be there whats the point?
he just spelled fiance, "pheancie". I dont think he's ready to get married.
frankly if you're gonna get kicked out of your place, hooking up with your gay roommate's boyfriend would be the most entertaining way to do it.
I'm sure it was awkward. I've never had a professor expose parts of them to me before.
Can u please come get me. My car keys are gone. Somehow I ended up sleeping in my trunk
You said you didn't want to drink anymore so you started shooting vodka down the back of your throat using a syringe. Oh, and then you aimed it at my eye ball...vodka in the eye hurts btw.
Thank god Shes going home for winter break, gives my dick a chance to recover from those "bjs." Youd think a senior could suck a dick by now.
You threw up on yourself mid conversation with your mom and then told her a girl at the party puked on you.
I fail to see the problem of enjoying a glass of wine while I poop...
the point I'm tryimg to make is that you didn't need to take the whole box in with you
So to recap Superbowl Sunday - I won $100, bumped into the anti-christ and his cult, met a guy in a kilt and a wican, then got invited to a gayguy afterhours party.
Gonna be tough to beat that next year!
Dude fuck drugs. It's 4am and I'm eating mushroom ravioli fantasizing about jumping on a trampoline
Lol he touched my butt after his grad party and a shooting star went by. No kidding. My ass is mystical.
We both knew it was over when I took a u turn at her belly button.
Girl. There is no more toilet paper. You should have seen the twerking I just did to shake the pee off.
He cut off part of his middle finger playing the knife game while singing The Knife Game Song at the top of his lungs. He also scream like a girl when his finger hit the floor and he realized he fucked up.
Randomize
