Just wanted to let you know that if you need my services as a male dancer for his birthday, let me kno so I can clear my schedule
when my dick couldnt get hard she said "fly on little wing"
I may or may not have just visibly given him head in front of three young children and their mom. They all looked mortified.
I think we should make a list of challenges so that when stuff like that happens, we can check it off. Like a scavenger hunt for hoes.
new girl just came onto the hall stumbling drunk with no shoes on and the guy who brought her doesn't have them either
Everyone threw up but him. I took off my shirt because I puked on it. There were also a lot of drag queens involved.
Jazzercise themed birthday pub crawl. 6 bars in 6 hours.everyone was a hot mess.
one minute he's happily playing with a lighter and the next thing I know, he's screaming and the swing set is on fire
She gave me what I will now dub a "hurricane sandy". Loud, wet and sloppy BJ that made me want to stay home and complain about shit on the Internet
all a girl really needs is a few good pair of leggings and a drug dealer that delivers.
I know he’s a bad decision but he's casual, his penis is amazing and his technique is on point.
He didn't even get to the first chorus of Hotel California before he started convulsing on top of me.
Today's hangover is brought to us by Sailor Jerry's and your dedication to my alcoholism.
just had an allergic reaction to my dildo. My life is ruined.
still drunk on my way to class to give my presentation on the negative affects of alcohol on the body. hell yes.
I had to break up with her. She was sending me study schedules and recipes for vegan lasagna. I’m just trying to survive man
Randomize
