i googled "where to have sex in disneyland." i found nothing.
The only reason why I invited him to my party was because he is suicidal.
apparently 9 shots of absynthe does not take away your skill to walk. i just woke up under a tree in some field on the other side of town with 4 hours missing.
i guess i finally out drove tiger woods this morning..
don't blame me for your drunken lack of judgement
big words... still drunk. dont care. your fault.
She was our DD the least I could do is have sex with her. Even when drunk I'm still chivalrous.
no. 1 rule of bromania: no females
this is why ugly people need low self esteem. it stops them from doing shit like this.
We found her. She's owling on the sink in the bathroom.
they had to take the Corona's out of the fish tank because they wouldn't fit with the mini replica of the roman coliseum in there. so we drank the Corona's. does beer have an expiry date?
Go to hungover. Go directly to hungover. Do not pass go. Do not collect 200 dollars
Did you survive the Atlanta roadway snowpocalypse?
All the bars are closed. Might as well be dead.
I'm crying and shaving my Bronco playoff beard
I’m really regretting these suede pants.
I literally blew him under my face mask. Not because I thought it'd protect me from COVID, but because I wanted to prove to myself that I could.
Randomize
