hapi new year, hope this year brings u happiness and lots of sexi people ;)
stop writing like that.
You're surprisingly coherent for someone who thinks her couch is breathing.
If he thought that flying across an ocean to visit me in London constituted sex, he thought wrong.
Weekday college schedule so far: get high as tits. Watch Family Guy marathons. Repeat.
I'm ultimately at thr Shariton to drink and ppssibly puke on fancy shit. Thats my story and Im sticking to it.
There's a questionable stain on Harley's bed...would they have sex on a dog bed?
I'm driving while wearing hulk hands
No later than 4:00 ok - I'm tying my viagra high into a superbowl halftime showstopper. Ya, you might wanna look away for that
He literally named all the parts of the vagina as he fingered me. No more pre-med virgins.
Two words: blizzard sex
you flipped over the sheets and there was my bed. filled with ding dongs.
I just pulled back the shower curtain to reveal Cinnamon Toast Crunch and a spoon in the bathtub. Ambien is a hell of a drug.
I think I just got suckerpunched by a 14-year-old.
Probably going to live on vodka sodas and fireball shots
he's annoying when i'm sober but vaguely hot when i'm drunk so yes i do have a preference and it goes by the name of vodka
Randomize