Would it be a dick move to report the suite next-door for a noise violation? They're singing Bad Romance off-key and I'm not sure if I can allow that.
Well, at least he doesn't refer to you as his associate. his mattress associate
I feel like the devil slapped me in the face with his dick.
Birthday success
I DON'T EVEN KNOW ONE MINUTE IM SITTING HER THE NEXT IM FLYING PASSED THE MOON
PISSING MYSELF IN ZERO GRAVITY
THOSE AIN'T STARS U SEE TONIGHT GURL
Just letting everyone know that I am still alive after last night. On a related note, this is the 15th "I'm not dead!" mass text I've sent. You've got to celebrate the little things.
Its not that it wasnt fun. Its just I got a tooth knocked out and that was my second time being arrested this year
Nothing like waking up and watching Dr. Phil and masturbating. It's like a protein shake for the day.
last night we were hooking up when all the sudden he just murmured "mm blonde". i don't know what to think about this situation.
You can fuck right off with that, "If the earthquake isnt bigger than 5.0, we native Californians dont get out of bed." I am from Chicago. I can handle freak flash floods, polar vortexes and tornados. But my bed violently shaking at 6:30 in the morning is cause for some understandable concern.
If I had a penis, I'd want to put it in you. And I'd treat you with respect and pay for your drinks.
there's people who respect me enough not to bang on my bed and i think that's beautiful
Wanna have a sleepover and take me to court in the morning?
He lives 20 minutes away driving distance and decided to walk. I talked to him today and he took a nap along the way... In a cemetery.
No reason. My tongue went numb after one shot. I may die tonight
You really do take on your dog's personality she sounded like her pug breathing when we were going at it.
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