your head's too prwtty to be stuck in the books
so chris just stuck his hand between rachel's legs and yelled 'TROUT!' and we were like...you're wasted
capt morgan doesn't hurt if you honestly believe it's golden flavored kool-aid.
Sarah Palin just got hired for Fox News. Watch out Jersey Shore... there's a new drinking game in town
I passed out on the floor of a truck stop. Drinking binge 2011 is now over.
I just caught myself watching and Irish step dance documentary in my underwear drinking nyquil through a straw at 2 in the afternoon. today's off to a good start.
we played a my little pint drinking game. It was awesome.
I have got to stop letting people hang ornaments from my nipple ring.
Tis the season.
I deserve to be covered in dicks
I haven't had an orgasm since 2014. So you cam see why I'm having a bad year.
Okay, yeah, judgmental guy at 7/11. I'm buying g wine at 10:20 in the morning. You wanna fight about it?
Um, when I went down on you it got stuck there. Still had gum in my mouth. Didn't exactly have use of my hands to assist
can you take a pic of your glorious tits but not send it just yet? I need motivation to finish this bull shit presentation.
Well I had to have sex with him so he would buy me plan b. The fact that I had sex with someone else last night who couldn't afford it is irrelevant.
I sent him nudes while he is at work because I am an evil human being.
Randomize