Where are you?
In a non slutty way
just had a super intense, drunken debate about which blink182 member is the most fuckable. i got so mad i left the room. new low.
What's the protocol when you drive the girl's head into the wall during sex and she starts to cry?
In the 30 seconds it took me to leave the bar I let the barback motorboat me, ripped open a stranger's shirt and bit his chest, then made out with El Camino dude. No, I'm not coming out tonight.
Is it sad that i just saw my moms thumb on the table & i instinctively put mine down cuz i thought she was thumbmaster?
It's official, there's a sex tape of me floating around some high school
Maybe he'll be famous someday and I can forget that anything embarrassing may have happened and just say that I fucked that famous guy.
Saxophones in my mind. I swear someone dosed me.
In my drunk state I was like I ONLY HAD SEX WITH SOMEONE ELSE BECAUSE HE WAS THE HOTTEST GUY IVE EVER EVEN SEEN
All I got was pictures of my boss and dicks. So, that was the end of snapchat.
Was it cause you feel bad for the ridiculousness my vagina goes through because same
honestly i've never been more attracted to you than when you threw up on my floor
Weight watchers just said "you've tracked beer three times recently, want to make it one of your favorites?" I'm begining to understand why I needed to go in the first place.
I thought he was a lobster and that the moon was going to pull me through him.
I don't think I should try acid.
Is that strawberry winking at me??
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