And i was thinking, 'i'm happy to be underneath you, but i wish you weren't doing THAT.'
I don't think he has that. His apartment was pretty much a tv and a bed. Topless girl calendar and a glass of water to put out cigarettes.
get home. someone threw up in the fishtank last night.
his mom and i are swapping prescript pills..totally mother in law material.
Someone played tic tac toe on my abs?
Saw a guy in a chef outfit covered in mustard talking jiberish into his phone running across the skywalk.
He literally had a note from his doctor saying he wasn't allowed to finger me for a week
check off brunette on the list of girls tht hit me with there cars and then fucked me later
I like my landing strip. Makes me feel sophisticated.
What you did last night can never be called sophisticated. I don't care how you trim your pubes.
She called to say she's single and blow job season is back.
That stripper was not happy when I tried putting a dollar in her court mandated ankle bracket/tracking device
stalking the twitter feeds of girls who have fucked my current fuck buddy makes me glad we use condoms
idk what happened last night but i just wokeup with nothing on but a necklace...what is this, the fucking titanic?
The sex was totally worth how awkward its gonna be for the next few weeks
Drunk me made cabbage burritos at 1am after going to hustler hollywood.\nI bought socks. Lol
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