Nothing gets me like the O.C. theme song does.
looking back it was a good thing we were too wasted to fire up the chainsaw
I walked into my room to see them crying, watching hey arnold, and passing a franzia box back and forth...
Dude..this is the third year in a row me and him have fucked at a super bowl party..does that count as a tradition?
he went at my nipples like a starved dog.
8===D
That's the bat signal to come over and fuck me.
We need a shit load of segways right now
Their first impression of me was that I was completely naked. So yeah college hasn't even started yet and I'm already that person.
I wish drunk me came with subtitles
After fooling around at the hotel til dawn, I managed to feed her with my free buffet passes. Tastes like sweet victory.
I just remembered touching your bosses wife's fake tits last night. Thanks again for taking me to your work function.
Oh the best part of having sex with him was that he made me a smoothie after
Can we get pizza? This is seriously not a booty call. I just really want someone to get pizza with me.
YOU UNCULTURED BADGER
imagine the bill from school house rock beating the shit outta you
Randomize
