It was kinda weird being the boss
Did you feel like Tony Danza?
Successfully pulled the houdini tonight. Check that off my list.
I just made a milkshake without a blender... thats determination
Don't worry we didnt bang. Sometimes I just bring guys home so I don't order pizza.
He's married, a coworker, and a smoker. not sure which personal rule broken i'm most ashamed of...
I just had my first experience getting hit on by a guy. It was really awkward, he touched my chest and invited me to a gay bar because "women get drunk and let their guard down at gay bars"
thats actually pretty good logic
nobody understands how my tooth became embedded in the ceiling last night.
I mean i can't really be mad...either way i was gonna fuck him or hate fuck him, so it's basically a win/win situation.
Think of it this way, instead of a puppy, we're getting a baby.
holy fucking shit get me out of here. even the babies are wearing beanies
This mustache is awesome. I can't pass by a mirror without looking in it and thinking damn, I'd like to give that guy a handy.
That was so not worth putting pants on for.
Would you consider masturbating to Hocus Pocus an adulthood high or low?
I just don't understand why we can't have sex in the house. I'll come see you but I'll have to think about the barn thing.
My butthole is tingling. Must be the grapefruit juice
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