I've never had a man I enjoyed more than steak
Theres this fat girl in desperate need of the proactive factory in my class and as i watch her shovel food in her face I am struggling to not only keep down my meager lunch but also to stay straight. Eliza Dushku couldnt even get my flacid dick to move
When my girlfriend drinks sangria it's like winning the vagina lottery
I just woke up in my closet, wearing a pink cowboy hat and a pink thong...
I want my thong back.
I hate you tequila.
That's the last time I try to be adventurous at a gas station
my passenger side seat is covered in alcoholic jello with a nude mannequin in it
it was like fucking gandolphs beard
i guess when we were done i grunted "unforgiveable" and walked out.
How did you get the entire couch up on it's side and into the bathroom?
His roommate just snorted a line of Smirnoff off the desk. I could really fit in here.
gpnpr hd vmdd nm the ggrl whm was mn my lar
I need you to use more vowels.
I would say I am sorry for punching you last night, but I found the pictures you took on my camera and it all came rushing back.
Yeah dude, it's amazing. Be careful though, that shit is really really intense. Like it's way more intense than normal shit...
I took two and feel like crushed diamonds spread over glazing marmalade
ever had one of those days where you say fuck it and lick the inside of a bag of chips
Actually we have similar relationship styles aka no relationship... it could work
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