it wouldnt have been so bad but she still had the cowboy hat on when my mom walked in
sent the pic of my tit to the wrong bbm chatroom
cat food counts as protein by the way
the whole "pretend to be sober/pull it together for my family" thing really blew up in my face when i threw up into my pillowcase.
She just admitted to me that she was a pinecone.
We're bowling witha frozen turkey in the hallway...ur missing out
Hey I have your shoes. Do you remember shouting "Police brutality!" when the bouncer was kicking you out last night?
Ice that vagina down, get some coffee, and try not to walk with a limp. It's time to dominate, pull it together
He took getting"shit in your neighbors hot tub drunk" way to literally
sometimes u just have to say fuck it and help a straight sixteen year old break into her uncles gay bar.
So if I tell her fire is hot and it will burn her... she's probably just going to keep throwing her vagina at it huh?
He fingered me in a Waffle House bathroom and then stole a traffic cone. Is this love that I'm feeling?
2 six inch heels, 3 big sangrias, no broken legs
Not sure but if it exists I will find it and I will fill my face with it
It makes my nipple hurt just thinking about it.
Randomize