I just did your MASH and your life is pretty unfortunate. Youre marrying the tech guy for love. you live in a shack and you're a hooker and you make $1 a day. you drive a brown limo and you have 7 kids
I just spent the last hour spooning with my drug dealer.
then she made me sanitize my hands before fingering her...i may have found my soulmate
Highlight of my evening, pile of books falling onto me in front of people
Totally about to meet up with Ryan in an empty parking lot. Expect to fuck him. Yes I know it's 3am. Slutty? Possibly. Excited? Damn right.
What the hell did I do to get youtube to recommend a video for me called "how to increase your chances of getting pregnant"?
I don't think you have the libido for two women at the same time
I think you underestimate the amount of time spent masturbating
She was drinking straight whiskey out of her peacock shaped vase again.
Woke up on the kitchen floor cuddling with the dummy we made of you. Hope your internship is going well.
Hold my feet while i lean out of the window of the truck.
I mean, we do coke and have sex occasionally...I wouldn't call that a relationship.
Did you seduce any young men into coming home to your love nest of poutine and jäger bombs?
Just had a threesome. Girlfriend wasn't a part of it. Broke up with her by sending her a picture of it. Hell is going to be awesome
Nothing cures your heart after a boy calling you unattractive than a big fat dick
I'm at home 4 xanax deep watching She's all that.. no I don't want to go out. The couch is eating me.
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