You weren't lying about those ceramics students giving the best hand jobs.
oh my god i just remembered the cat blow jobs.
Does it make me a prostitute if I accepted a Life House concert ticket for giving this guy head?
No. It just means your good at giving head.
I can't tell if I miss summer or 5 times a day sex more.
we should probably just go check in at the police station right now
The low-flow toilet at my office cannot handle the intensity of this hangover.
Looks like a took a video of myself beating off and passed out last night. I'm classy.
I shaved my pussy for you. If you complain about a single hair that I missed again, you will be greeted by a bush the next time you go down on me and i will MAKE YOU KEEP GOING
Don't send me heart emojis when you're jacking off.
You took motorboating me in public to a whole new level. You poured your beer down my top and LAPPED IT UP.
I'm high. The text bubbles floating do no justice to the underwater experiences
Let's not share with anyone else in the apartment of how we simultaneously peed in the kitchen sink last night.....
I just wanna know if were done hooking up so I know of that condom he left in my top drawer is fair game
Woke up with a $100 bill from the Philippines in my bra & an unopened box of sour patch kids next to me. I have some questions.
Sitting on couch, workout sex makes me more sore than regular workout
Randomize
