he was so drunk he doesn't remember anything. I have to break up with him all over again
I just smelled my beer. It smells like coming home.
Cute you're picking friends over dick. I feel like this is the trailer for a lifetime movie.
You do realize that we bought beer at 9:30 in the morning to avoid sobering up. Stupidity was bound to follow.
She's dressed as a slutty Dalmatian. I doubt she has morals.
When I don't want to forget things I put them on my cigs.
C smoking isn't all bad
never underestimate the power of walking into a bar alone in uv cat makeup.. took home a seven foot man
Too many penises have met your hands. Stop or die.
That feeling when you're ready to convert to the religion of whatever god will stop the vomit. Dynamite is illegal.
So his shoes are still here. And there are three contacts in a case. And a shirt on the bed. I've checked my dorm and he's not here. I'm so confused.
How do I tell my hairdresser I want a hair style I saw in a porn video?
The hair on my legs is officially flapping in the breeze when I walk. I must say, being single does have perks and this is one of them.
First day back to class and I have already pulled out the hard liquor
I have 3 bottles of vodka in my room telling me not to go to work tomorrow.
I just tried to snap you a picture of the CVS where we decided not to become parents.
Randomize
