in my opinion joe jonas is kinda pointless. hes just the pretty boy front runner.
are u sure the monkey wasnt drunk too
I like complaining with weaving words and complex sentences. It makes me seem more sophisticated and less bitchy.
obama could have borrowed sotomayor's dick when he threw out that that first pitch like a girl last night
waiting in line for my ID. the kid in front of me reaks of hopes and dreams and hornyness-- freshmen by calvin klein
I'd suck anything for a pizza right now
Just woke up with three stitches in my left boob. Nevertheless, I think I'm going to like this school.
hooking up with my manager sounds like an even better idea while i'm sober.
I tried. Now my legs are bleeding and I cracked my head on the coffee table. Never taking your advice again.
Fun fact. I am at the police dept. getting served a warrant for unpaid ordinance... and the officer was a one night stand from like 10 years ago.
I am not working on the very first day I can throw up alcohol that I legally bought and drank.
We really gotta change brands again because 2-ply is making us feel like the celebrities we aren't.
Judging by the ckaw marks on my back i'm gonna go out on a limb and say that blonde chick was a werewolf. A sexy, kinky werewolf.
we could do so many fantastic illegal things together. sexually and otherwise.
we tried to make a drinking game out of 4 pokemon cards you found in a drawer.
Randomize
