Look at my ENTIRE past
Highly public sexual behavior gross mismanagement of funds socially unaccpetable and radical speech and thought
Might as well have a blog about it at this point
he whispered in my ear that he would be upstairs and i should come up. i stayed downstairs. he came back down and repeated to whisper in my ear. this happened about 5 times until he passed out.
you really should stop posting my phone number on craigslist as tranny seeking tranny, last night i answered at family dinner and almost choked on my hot dog
do you not see the irony in that??
he told me it was a naked video of him so i opened it. i just got rickrolled while sexting
Just lit a joint with steel wool and a 9 volt battery... thank you 3rd grade science class
U handed him a box of flavored condoms, winked, and slurred, "grape juice is her favorite."
She kept telling the ambulance to sit down and then started crying when we told her it couldn't hear her
There's a homeless man outside the bar. I have a toothbrush and toothpaste in my car. I think i'm going to give them to him. And they said drinking is bad.
You're so thoughtful.
Try to make ecstasy cheese. Capitalize on the molly and greek yogurt trends. MARKETING
if you arent using your penis to save lives, then what good is it?
Why did I wake up with BYOB sharpied on my stomach
in retrospect i think my mom tried to raise me gay
At least your nickname is not Plunge Slut and that nickname is not in a published thesis work
Okay first of all fuck you and everything you stand for because Taco Bell is amazing.
look im sitting on my bathroom floor in my underwear snorting cocaine can we talk about this later
Randomize
