Do you think red sox nation has an official powerpoint template/memo format for resignations of manny support, bandwagon applications, and other official business?
Facebook is used to stalk your friends, Twitter is used to stalk celebritie=s, and Myspace is used to stalk underaged girls. Everything else is porn. T=he Internet in a nutshell.
it's already thursday and i haven't gotten drunk yet...something's not right.
This sounds like "Sober" Ericka. Sorry that message wasn't for you. I only do business with "Fell off the wagon" Ericka. Please pass that message along to her.
I want something that's relevant to him banging her right after I did. Like "runner-up"
Nothing will ever prepare you for the moment when you are sitting on your friends bathroom floor with no pants on eating string cheese & pita at 2am.
Pretty sure I just convinced a drunk guy at the train station that I was from the future
I'm so hungover I literally am considering drinking from the fishtank to avoid getting out of bed.
Did he seem like the type of guy that would maybe take weed as payment?
You had two tasks: \n1) put on a condom \n2) text me so I don't walk in on you \nIt really isn't that hard
My purpose is to unleash drunk self on strangers, i believe as some terrifying icebreaker, otherwise i too would offer my driving services.
My mom just asked me if I knew what Buzzfeed was. Then said she's watching the second Magic Mike for the bodies. Please help.
Giant stained glass jesus is judging my black pleather pants
burned my penis with a sauteed onion again.
I ate at the cafeteria for the first time yesterday and today I think I had an hour long fart.
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